I was interviewed for a national magazine this week, and the writer asked me “what was the one significant life lesson learned in my vast years of experience’. This is a clue that she was obviously younger and more attractive than myself – “vast years of experience” translates consistently into “Ole’ Geesey.”
The question actually took me quite by surprise. Certainly, I have had the rare fortune to climb to the mountain and learn from the most iconic figures of our lifetime – having spent time with Redford, Coppolla, Bono, Gore and B. Clinton, P. Cruz (boy, did I screwed that one up!), Welch, and about 50 others. What a ride!
But the lesson that immediately comes to mind was learned from Cary Justice. Cary was a friend since elementary school. She was somewhat shy and kept mostly to herself all the way until high school, and then she turned High School hot! She was thin, tall, blond, and ripening just a bit ahead of her peers. And in 12th grade, she hadn’t spoken to me for about 6 years.
In my junior year, I ran for Student Body Vice President…as a joke. I was a geek, a pseudo star of the tennis team. If there was an “in crowd”, I was so far from it that I couldn’t even identify it. I ran against the perennial jock - captain of the football team, baseball team and basketball team. He was a GREAT athlete.
But evidently, I was a better marketer….
I won. I started to get noticed.
Then, I tried out for the football team (I hadn’t played since 4th grade). I made the team! (well, there were no cuts…). To everyone’s astonishment, I actually did quite well, and was asked to be the starting defensive end for the 3rd game of the season. The guy whose starting position I took was quite happy to point out that the coaches plan was actually to take me out after the first two 2 plays. I was enraged at the thought that my big opportunity was just a veiled pat on the back for working hard, not a true recognition that I was worthy- a can of green spray paint and I could have passed for the Incredible Hulk. I went out on the field breathing fire. I made the first two tackles, two big quarterback sacks later on, 6 more tackles and one fumble recovery!
And suddenly, I was popular!, albeit for a very brief moment.
Being named Student Body VP and earning a starting spot on the varsity football team took me from anonymously geeky to ubiquitously cool in just a few short months. The kids talked about me. The local newspaper wrote about me. And all those girls who had ignored me for years started to show up around my locker. ALL OF THEM!!!
Sure, I was thrilled! The highlight of my love resume up to that moment had been climbing the rope in 7th grade. Now, I was talking to real girls!
With the confidence of Iron Man walking out of a cave, I walked right up and asked Cary Justice out. She said yes. I almost wet myself.
Later that week, I arrived at her house to pick her up. True story…Her dad let me in, and I quickly noticed a shotgun laid out in pieces on the dinning room table – he was cleaning it – he was a police officer. I laughed. He looked up. He did not laugh. I threw up just a bit in my mouth…
Cary finally came down, and she looked beautiful. We drove to a party, where she quickly found her real, popular friends. Its funny now, but I don’t even remember speaking at all to her. I went home alone, without ever saying goodbye. (yet successfully dodging the inevitable gunplay from her father!!)
One Story. Three Lessons.
ONE. Popularity is sweet, and fleeting in life. It is here one day and gone the next in High School. And the longer you live, you realize you have never truly graduated from High School.
TWO. The things you want the most, once realized, are often less precious than you would have guessed. And in many cases are less than what you already have.
THREE. The success that No One, maybe not even yourself, expects you to achieve, might just be possible. And just maybe, it’s right around the corner.
