On Sunday I completed the Big Sur International Marathon in California. After the race, I was lucky enough to bump into Jesus Carlos, the winner of the race. We shared race times (his – 2:20, mine – 5:54), talked about the spectators and marveled at the amazing scenery – you know, the kinda banter you would expect from such high performance athletes after a big event.

“I must admit, you are really my hero.” I told him.

“Why would that be?” he responded, a bit surprised.

“Well, it is just incredible that you could finish the race in only 2 hours and 20 minutes!” I exclaimed.

“No, Rick, YOU are MY hero!” he responded.

“Uh, I don’t understand. How could that be?” I asked.

“I just can’t imagine how anyone would run anywhere for 6 hours!!”

Guess what?  The recruiters are starting to call again.

This is positive news.  The recession has created perhaps a historic level of employee discontent.  Pay has been flat or decreasing for many.  Companies have cut benefits.  Boss’s have gotten away with bad behavior.  Promotions have been scarce, leading to longer tenure in a position, and boredom.

Usher in some alternatives, and many are quick to consider moving.

But wait.  It is never a good idea to jump ship simply out of frustration.  Take this job and shove it is great fodder for a country song, but creates an awkward dance on a resume.

Here are 5 questions to help you know if you are leaving for the right reason:

1. Will the new opportunity utilize my strengths more on a daily basis?
2. Will I be able to spend more time solving the problems I really want to solve?
3. Will I be able to build my value in the marketplace at a faster rate?
4. Do I like and respect the person I will be working for (references?)?
5. Will the “devil I don’t know” really be better than the “devil I do?”

Notice the one thing that is conspicuously absent from this list – pay.  Compensation, IMHO, is the worst factor to base a career decision on.  Recruiters will use it to lure you to a job that otherwise you wouldn’t take.

And just like that, you will be stuck in a cubicle staring out the window, longing for the next recruiter to call.

It seems that there are certain things that happened in my life, that had they never occurred, my life could not have possibly turned out as it did.

Equally, there are other things I desperately wanted, that had they actually come true, would have taken me down a completely different path.

I guess I should believe it was fate.

Or, perhaps that things might have turned out pretty darn ok no matter what life threw at me.

Sometimes we put so much pressure on specific decisions, important divides in the road, seemingly life altering moments from which there is no turning back.

Only to find later that life has a way of working itself out.

“I consistently deliver on my pre-defined objectives.  I am able to routinely accomplish what is expected of me.  On time, on spec. Clockwork.”

These are the comments of a proud worker.  And there are many of them.  In fact, nearly all of you.  The research conducted for my first book showed that 95% of professionals feel that they consistently meet their stated objectives.

This is good news for employers.  But terrible news for you.  How in the world are you going to stand out, if you are merely doing what everyone else is doing?

What sets the winners and losers apart in the workplace is the ability to do what is needed, not just what you are told to do.  In many cases, this requires doing the opposite of what you are asked.

If you are getting along by only doing what you are told, hold on – your job is about to be outsourced to India.  But if you are a thinker – really using your perspective and insight to do what is most valuable for your company – than we have unlimited use for your services.

Are you doing what is needed rather than what you are told at work?

1. No one gives you credit for your previous success.

All the excitement, the accolades and accomplishment that go with launching your previous company stayed with the old company.  Hey, people may be a little more curious to see what you are up to this time, but in the end, the business concept either stands on its own or it doesn’t.  We tweaked our approach more than a dozen times until we got it right – and only then did things take off. Benefit of the doubt is a myth.

2. The biggest sale is to your employees.

Sure, landing that first customer (actually, cashing that first check) is sexy and exciting.  Getting partners lined up is critical.  But the most important sale a start-up CEO can make is to their employees.  You have nothing but a concept.  You cannot offer any form of stability.  You don’t even know what the company will look like in a year.  All you can offer is a vision of an exciting future – and a positive, fun place to work.  And if you are just lucky enough to convince a handful of the very best people to join you for the ride, you are well on your way to the destination.  I know of many leaders, even CEOs, who are widely considered a$$ holes by their employees. There aren’t many founders with this same reputation.

3. The biggest advantage is your learning curve.

You have succeeded once before in a specific market.  You learned a lot.  But it’s not what you now know that is valuable the second time around.  It’s your ability to learn faster.  I don’t know much about the market which I am currently seeking to disrupt.  But I make decisions faster.  I am quicker to pull the trigger on a great idea, and to pull the plug on a bad one (or employee).  I feel that we are growing as a team, as a concept and as a company at an accelerated rate.  And that feels like a real competitive advantage.

In January, I was entering the heavier end of the marathon training schedule.  Longer, more frequent runs.  Very long runs every other Saturday.  I grew increasingly less confident, and increasingly scared.

Then, I got injured.

I sprained my calf during a 12 mile run.  Not just sore, but really hurt.  I looked it up online, and submitted to the recovery regiments that were prescribed.  But the pain did not go away.  And when I would try to run on it, it would only make things worse.

So I went to see an orthopedic MD specializing in sports medicine.  I told him about my training.  I told him about the pain.  I told him that I had read that I needed a prolonged rest to fully recover.  He was not impressed.

“Rick, you’re just going to have to suck it up.”

“Huh?  But I have a big run this weekend.  I am hurting here, doc!  You are saying I should go??”

“Yes.”

“But what if I am running and it hurts?”

“Then you walk.  You walk until you can run again.  You see, your brain is giving you an ‘out’ with this pain.  You need to tell your brain that you don’t need an excuse to quit, that you are going to keep going.”

I ran 14 miles the next weekend. With no pain.  In fact, I have not felt pain in my calf since I left the doctors office.  I told my brain that I was fine, and didn’t need the excuse anymore.

Your brain is hard-wired with thousands of years of built-in defense mechanisms.  When you are pushing your limits in work, family, exercise – anything where things can get really tough – watch for your brain to present you with a great excuse to simply quit.  Everyone will understand.  It was just too much.  It was really out of your control.

Or, you can choose to keep running.

Everyone hates the idea that some people rise through the ranks simply because they develop a friendly relationship with the boss. On some level, it just doesn’t seem fair.

But do you hang out with friends whom you don’t have a relationship with? Who you don’t like? Of course not. We enjoy hanging around people that we like. Always has been. Always will be.

The question is not whether or not to have a relationship with your boss – but in how to achieve this, and this is where most people fall down. Are you sucking up to your boss by always telling them that they are right? Do you think that by making them feel smarter, they will like you more? Well, you are wrong.

What (rational) bosses at all levels seek is intellectual integrity. They want you to tell them the real answer – to give them the good news and the bad – so that they can better manage their jobs.

Sucking up to the boss with undeserved accolades may have a very short term relationship benefit. But the only way to develop a relationship with your boss based on mutual respect – a relationship that will pay real dividends in your career over time – is to haul off and whack your boss over the head with the truth.

We were taught that we have a work life and a personal life.

As far as I can tell, we only have ONE life.

Does your work engage your passions?

Are you learning when you are not at work?

Are you as passionate on the way to work as on the way home?

Do your hobbies teach you, stretching your mind and broadening your perspective?

You only have ONE life. Spend wisely…

1) Your primary color. Your truest strengths and passions point to the activities where you will perform the best.

2) Your salary expectations – and what you specifically plan to do/ how you plan to grow to justify future increases

3) Your long term ambitions.  Get your boss invested in your big hairy goal.

4) That your objective is to become redundant in your current job. Managing yourself out of your job is a sign of a great leader. Developing others so that they can take over for you is a prerequisite for getting promoted.

5) Your swimsuit pictures from summer vacation on Facebook. Well, actually you should hide this. It is socially acceptable to un-friend your boss. God forbid you ever unwittingly glance at THEIR swimsuit pictures. Kinda like accidentally staring at the sun.

Are there any others you would add to the list?

Back in October, I jokingly commented to my family that I was going to sign up to run a marathon. Well, I didn’t think I was joking (although I am not at all sure I was serious), but my children certainly did. Their ceaseless laughter led me to actually sign up, perhaps to prove them wrong, perhaps to prove something similar to myself.

Now, it is more than 5 months later, with 1.5 months to go before the big run (Big Sur, May 1). Here is a summary of what has changed during this time:

What have I learned from all this? That training is like a train. If you get on, it will take you to a predictable destination. These changes are totally surprising to myself, but not to those who have run marathons before.

If you commit to the program – not just the big, challenging parts, but the middle, mundane boring parts as well, all of them – you will emerge at the end a changed person. This is the same for any major challenge you take on in life.

It’s not the destination that you are committing to. It’s the journey. And if you commit your heart and mind to the journey, all the destination stuff has a way of taking care of itself.